Why is humans derailed?Really only 0 and countless times?Scientific research gives proof
“I know this is wrong, but I can’t help it …”
#Hzh_woman {display: none;}
Mang (a pseudonym) is 36 years old. He has a middle -level management in a foreign company and has a good family.
Her husband opened the company by herself and often flew across the country. Although she was busy with her work, she was still very good to her. She often gave her gifts and created romance as soon as she was free. There are also nanny at home, so the elderly and children do not have to worry too much.
Colleagues C always admired the vines, often asking for warmth, and sent her home. After a long time, Man Man began to depend on C, and the relationship was out of control.
“I am very contradictory and bitter, but I feel very happy …”
The survey revealed: 76%of people have “derailed” many times
The Civil Affairs Bureau conducted a derailed survey in 2000 and 2005, respectively. The results showed that the derailment rate of men was 11.8%in 2000. By 2005, this number became 34.8%, which turned three times. This is equivalent to every 10 married men, 3.4 people have derailed experiences, which is shocking.
In 2016, “Facts” issued a survey on a derailed attitude through the online social platform. In just a few days, 70,000 netizens filled out the questionnaire.
Data from the recycling questionnaire show that only 11.9%of people who have never had derailment experience, 76.2%of people have multiple derailment and cheating behaviors, 12%only once. Among them, more than 60 % of women with derailment ideas, and more than 80 % of men. Among these people, there are substantial derailment, women account for more than 40 %, and men are close to 60 %.
Marriage is happy, why are there so many people to take risks and derailment?
The “derailment” has attracted the attention of anthropologists and sociologists early. The famous “Golden Scholarship Report” revealed that more than 1/3 men have betrayed their wives, and 26%of the married, divorced and widow women There was an extramarital behavior before the age of 40, and this was the data of the 1940s.
Why is derailment only 0 or countless times? American anthropologist Helen Fisher pointed out that behind derailment phenomena is likely to be supported by biological principles.
First of all, derailment may be human “nature”, and this “nature” is likely to be formed in ancient times.
Like other animals, derailment is essentially an adaptive mechanism that can cause relationships with multiple opposite sex and produce offspring. For example, some birds may mate with different males at the same time to maintain genetic diversity combinations.
Secondly, Fisher also believes that human beings have evolved three kinds of basic brain systems that guide puppets and reproduction: sexual desire, attachment and love. However, the correlation between these three brain systems is not always high, that is, these three brain systems do not necessarily work on the same object. Therefore, the phenomenon of “a few boats” can be explained in biology.
In addition to the reasons for evolution, genes also play a role in derailment.
An experiment of an orange -stitched field mouse shows that there are differences in the specific gene composition in the posterior leaves in the body of the male mouse body, which makes the male mouse match differently with the puppet matching. One of the indicators include Sex loyalty of rats. The posterior lobe of humans and rats is very similar, which also confirms that different men’s loyalty to their spouses is different.
A survey of Sweden aims to understand the impact of genes on derailment. 552 men who have been investigated are either married or have lived with their partners for five or more.
The results showed that men with this gene scored very low in the questionnaire of the degree of attachment to the spouse. On the contrary, people without such genes have high scores and are not easy to derail. This also confirms that derailment is influenced and disturbed by genes.
Human beings are naturally “jealous” animals
Scholar Fisher also mentioned in his own works that human beings are born with jealousy. Different from most mammals to nurture offspring in groups, human beings will first form a “family”. With the development of this pairing relationship, the human brain has already produced instincts that maintain this relationship -humans like to control, never share it easily, and like jealousy.
Having said that, even if derailment can be explained by biological principles, these principles cannot be excluded for derailed people.
We are not the puppets of genes. The life of a person is not determined at the moment of the genome, and it will be affected by many acquired factors. Therefore, we can also choose the way of life correctly, instead of pushing all the faults to genes.
How can we avoid derailment and reduce harm to others?
Derailment will undoubtedly hurt the closest person around them and destroy the complete family. So what can be taken to avoid this situation and reduce damage?
1. See your real needs before marriage.
Many young people have not yet fell in love, and they are forced to get married by their parents and other external forces. On the basis of such a marriage, it is not firm. Married people do not know what they really want, and it is more likely to change after marriage. Therefore, for marriage, you must carefully examine your heart and consider more.
2. Do not escape with derailment when you encounter problems.
No one’s life is perfect, and people may suffer various setbacks in their lives, but it is so that they need to support each other to support each other and make it difficult.Instead of evading reality and seeking derailment to vent negative emotions.3. Treat frankly.
When there is a gap and contradiction between the husband and wife, they should reveal their hearts as soon as possible and open everything so that they can truly solve the problem.
In recent years, the “scum man” and “scum girl” have become hot vocabulary. People hate derailment, but they do not know that the phenomenon of derailment in marriage is not unusual.Although there are biological principles and genes behind this, it is more reflected in human choices.We should be responsible for ourselves and our partners.
Reference materials:
[1] Derailed, is self -rescue or self -destruction of life?. One psychology. 2018-10-31
[2] Marriage is very happy and still derailed?. Sanlian Life Weekly. 20120-04-06
